Saturday, February 03, 2007
this post is dedicated to my special girl friend, pupeng: bitch or darling or bong or asshole. i love you for who you are, whether or not you're strong. oh i remember how you were you hugged me when i was especially low, even when i screamed and shouted. you are the best friend who is not afraid to tell me that i'm wrong. because of that i'm who i am today and i'm very thankful for it. no matter who tell me you're the bad influence in my life, or the person dragging me down, I DON'T CARE BECAUSE IT'S THIS PATH THAT I'VE CHOSEN FOR MYSELF. and i'm so glad so elated that you're in my life, holding my hand and doing things together from going absolute crazy to skipping classes. i've never blamed you for anything you did because that makes you simply you. and who am i to change that? but there is this thing you have to do. you must talk to me. i wouldn't force you to because i know you hate being forced to do something you're unwilling to do. but i'll do my best to block every single stone that is thrown at you. i love you more than that so much to the extend that i don't know what to do when you're not around. you know on that day when you burst, when i ran back to biolab. i felt so alone, so desperate, like as if all the love and the people in the world i know just evaporated suddenly. i looked around the lab to look for anyone i knew; anyone i could find comfort in and that's when it hit me. i realised i had no one in class except you. i broke down immediately. i don't know why but i thought if i didn't have you, this was how it will feel. and the following day i saw you playing your clarinet at the foyer with the band, i can't stop hoping that you would be alright. that your own melodious music will heal all your wounds. and i really had the urge to kill whoever who had been hurting you, including myself. i know it sounds so cliched, but i want you to be not only happy but contented. i love you and it's special. its a love that is willing to do anything.i don't ever want you to feel what i had felt at the biolab. i'll never leave you even if you have problems with "darl", band, family, me or even yourself, i'll heave you up even if i'm to stay down. as you've always told me, life isn't always perfect. i know i cannot be perfect and so do you. but i love you for your imperfections. and you know there are many out there who love you to. don't live up to other's expectations of you but to your very own. be pupeng.
i love you
